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Huh?

June 18, 2008

Guess I’m not feeling too clever in the post-titling competition if there is even such a thing.   Huh? 

Annie, that writer chick with the new ‘big girl’ blog, has a post called Small It Down.     Go ahead, click on that link, and then come back here.  or not.  whatever.

My Hub is out of town and so I’m sitting here blogging into the evening.      I told him I had a hard long day. and then started to giggle. What I want is something else but has a similar description; I miss him.  

and here I go again, sitting down to write ONE thing and getting WAAAAYYYY off topic! again.

Did you go read Annie’s post and then come back or did you skip it and are still reading here?   Be honest. Hell, I probably lost ya.   You sauntered off over there, made a comment cuz the post is so good and then forgot all about coming back here, didn’t ya.   OK.   don’t blame ya.

I almost commented to Annie that I was feeling just the opposite of what she was conveying in her post. NOT that her post wasn’t AWESOME – which it is.      But that my issues are the opposite.  I small it down too much and then like a pond of mosquito hatching scum, I’ve become pooled, trapped even, into some nasty hatching bad thoughts of smallness.

My salvation is the outward approach and inspiration of the largeness of the world.   That my silly stupid miniscule problems that eat my brain are so…   NOTHING on the grand scale of life that I feel better realizing that I am a small cog of cheer or CAN be a cog of cheerfulness and sunshine that can add to the world’s well-being.   By that I mean, that I cannot  think small.   My worth increases as I consider my snowflake as part of the whole big iceberg.

I suppose we could be saying the same thing, it’s just a perception shift.   A different perspective of where you put the good in which way you look.

Be grateful LOUDLY and shout your joys out and up and beyond and experience it full, not small and tiny or puny. I don’t want to whisper to myself small and quiet and alone, I want to jump and cheer and clap and be glad and dance and live large; that’s what I want. I want to be a singing daffodil among thousands, all yellow happy and abundant.   I want the big bright sunshine, the tall pines swaying their approval, the clouds doing the bunny hop and the chicken dance. I want to feel like I can run up those mountains and enjoy the rapids that swiftly move thru any valleys to crash happily over the waterfalls.   I want to be a part of the big.

– Marianne Williamson  Return To Love 

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

– Marianne Williamson Return to Love 

I can still remember how I felt the first time I read this quote (often mis-attibuted to Nelson Mandela, he was quoting MW)    I was shocked, jolted.    Yea, “C” – who the hell are you to be thinking so little  of yourself?!    Truly, still, one of my greatest fears is that I’m not doing what I’m supposed to be doing. 

Have some sweet sugar-coated dreams now, ya hear.

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6 comments

  1. Hey C,
    Thanks for the link – and it’s funny but I agree with what you’re saying. I think the post I put up today was so personal that most people just took from it what spoke to them. Small it down wasn’t about making my life simpler or easier or changing my personality. It was about separating out my ‘stuff’ from other people’s ‘stuff’ – I’ve had a bit of sensory overload in the last few weeks and I needed to sorted it out. So – that my dear and wonderfully whacky friend is what I meant by small it down. So, keep dancing in the daffodils and screaming your love for life at the top of your lungs because, honey, we all love it.

    Love,
    Annie

    thank YOU, Annie. xoxoxox, C


  2. ANNIE!!! too fun, isn’t it? Remember when you wrote once about the posts that you think no one will read are exactly the ones that get all the hub-bub!? Really, the only thing I was going to do was to finally correct the link to your blog in my ‘roll. Look what happened!


  3. I see what you are saying here, C and although it may at first glance appear like your post is completely different than Annie’s, I think closer inspection reveals that the posts are more alike than they are different. If you take each to heart, you end up smalling down the unimportant things that shouldn’t weigh so heavily in your life and biggifying and celebrating the things that should take priority. I think the end result is clear contentment and pure happiness with nothing to cloud the bright beautiful view.

    Ah, Teeni! I can really sense that you gave this comment tremendous heartfelt thought. You are amazing. Thank you. I do like the word ‘biggify’… I’m working on a post of your latest meme, too, btw.


  4. I loved both posts. I want to sing and frolic in some freakin’ flowers AND get rid of everyone else’s stuff that interferes with my doing that. Lately I am doing better at doing those things except I need my cane for the frolicking. Great Post by the way.

    FROLIC IN SOME FREAKIN’ FLOWERS! yes, sounds good. Can you spin with that cane? this imagery reminds me of those dizzy spin with head on baseball bat and then walk a straight line games…


  5. I loved both posts, too. Thanks for linking to Annie’s big girl blog post. I hate losing someone from the wordpress fold, but it’s cool that she’s on her own. I just keep forgetting to go visit her. That quote from Williamson is special.

    Thank you, and I agree abt the ‘losing from the WP’ fold due to the sign in stuff. I need a form-filler-outer software pgm since I switched security systems – I have to type who I am, my email, my website EVERY time I comment now. OH well. SHE’S WORTH IT, of course… I recommend the Williamson book Return To Love if you have yet to read.


  6. I like that Williamson quote, too, and your response to it: “who the hell are you to be thinking so little of yourself?!” —heck, yeah! AND I got a new word here, today: biggify. Love it.



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